Remember what I wanted?

I wanted to stand on a beach somewhere. Nice long flowy dress. Rent a beach house for a week or two. Have everyone there. Hear the ocean in the background. Get married at dusk.
Tony wanted a big wedding. "If we have a big wedding, I'll help do everything 50-50".
Ummmm remember that?
Suddenly, "helping" is making a payment here and there, and giving opinions about things after they've been decided. When asked, it's "you know I really don't care" until later.

Tonight, he tells me he wants the groomsmen in a particular order-- his two brothers have to stand next to each other. Doesn't matter how tall they are. Doesn't matter how it'll look from the pews. I've asked him before who he wanted to walk with whom and he said he didn't care.
It's so frustrating. Seriously. I told him fine- to call Zhan (who is writing a program and running the show that day) and tell him...get involved. He won't. That's my job apparently. GRRRRRRRRR